Cassie Mae Hayes' 17th Birthday – In Cyberspace

Here’s Cassie Mae Hayes from The War Bug the night before her 17th birthday. Cassie is, of course, a virtual life form and lives in cyberspace. It’s not a bad place. This is where she works, igottahelluvacoffeeforyou.com with her VR friends Lessing, Ionesco and Nin.

Their favorite cyberbat Sartre is hovering over me, about to shit on my head while I’m taking their picture. They’re happy to see Sartre about to shit on my head. They’re waiting for Sartre to shit on my head. They can hardly contain their mirth waiting for their favorite cybserbat Sartre to shit on my head.

Cyberspace … always doomed to reflect reality.

This is the day of Cassie’s 17th birthday.

She’s still at igottahelluvacoffeeforyou.com. They just made her Princess LaLa. Anything’s possible in cyberspace. Beside her are her cyberworkmates AnnieAttitude and igoTADog, holding her pet cybergazelle, who, through a few lines of faulty code, thinks he’s a dog. They’re all waiting for Sartre to shit on my head again.

Cassie Mae thanks the 1,989,101,217 VR and for-real people who dropped by to see her at work, leaving 10,000 double chocolate cakes, 44 meat pies, 111 mocking birds, 202 marching bands, 2,772 free Snoop Dawg tickets (2,773 of them counterfeit), and 369,963 email birthday cards with pictures of cats. Anything’s possible in cyberspace.