Driving in Fredericton Blues - The Planners

OK. So I've had some nasty things to say about the drivers in this city. It's all true. About 99 percent of drivers in this city should have brain transplants from hamsters to increase their intelligence.

Having said that, let's consider the City of Fredericton Department of Traffic Flow Planning, often referred to as those *&^*%%&*^&*(%&*()^$ IDIOTS!

No shit. Traffic in Fredericton is planned so that you hit every red light in the city no matter how you adjust your speed. Congestion is the order of the day. Bottlenecks are favored.

There's an intesection downtown right by a Tim Horton's that's been designed to ensure that somebody is killed. It hasn't happened yet but it's coming. I've seen it almost happen a few times and almost had it happen to me once. If you would like to be the first to realize it, drive across the Westmoreland Street bridge and take the Regent Street exit. Drive around to the first intersection (you'll be greeted by a red light) (no matter how fast or slow you go) and drive forward. You'll come to the intersection of Regent and King. If you're going straight ahead in the right lane, you're probably alright. If you're going to turn left from the left lane, pray first.

The lanes are narrow and the traffic is thick. There's a sign saying no left turn to Tim Horton's that's ignored, if even noticed, by hundreds of tourists every summer who probably have already turned left into Tim Horton's before they realized what that idiotic sign really meant.

There are three intersections in the city of Fredericton that have been designed to be death traps. No amount of public outcry will ever change them. That's because intelligence and common sense and a knowledge of traffic flow are absent features at the City of Fredericton Department of Traffic Flow Planning.

So much so that everybody in the department - especially the ones who synchronize the traffic lights - should be arrested and charged with obstructing traffic.